~~Official~~

I'm just getting a chance to sit down and relax for a minute...or two. The past few days have been very busy and filled with studying for finals and preparing and planting our gardens.

Yesterday I worked in the garden all day and well into the evening. It felt really good. Not only did I burn a ton of calories and get a lot accomplished, I also felt a deep connection to my Grandpa. I just imagined him walking there beside me, working there in the garden right along with me. I have no doubt that he is enjoying his garden up in Heaven. His gardening tradition will now live on in each one of his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

I also push mowed much of the side yard, raked until my arms felt like they were going to fall off, and prepared the rows in the garden for planting. I thought I had stayed well hydrated through it all but I must not have. I came inside and took a nice cold shower to cool off before eating dinner. I had a few glasses of water with dinner (spaghetti) and finished it off with some fresh strawberries...YUM!

And then, it hit.

I had a screaming migraine and no meds! I tried everything. I tried cool cloths, heat, tylenol, more water, resting in pitch black with no sound, hot towels wrapped around my head and even drew a bath of hot water and submerged my head in that. Unfortunately, nothing helped! Thankfully, I did make it to the bathroom in time for my dinner to come back up.

Just for the record, spaghetti and strawberries do NOT come back up very gracefully! There is just something not quite right when angel hair pasta is hanging out of your nostrils. Not to mention the fear it puts into your spouse when they walk in and see the toilet bowl is bright red. I had to assure him it wasn't blood.

Several times I thought about going to the hospital but I just couldn't bring myself to call an ambulance. My pulse was racing at 120-130 and my head felt like it was going to explode. After seven hours, I finally fell asleep. Thankfully, it was gone this morning when I woke up. Okay, so...around lunch time, when I woke up!

Today I worked out in the yard some more. I didn't over do it this time though. I made sure to make more frequent water breaks. I did get tomatos, onions, peppers, squash, and cucumbers in today though. We still have peas, watermelon, pumpkins, cantalope, sweet corn and a couple more things I can't remember now to plant.

We are still awaiting on our new additions to join our family. We are expecting again. Well, not WE...but our geese. We couldn't find White Wing a few weeks back. When we approached the pen, Pluto kept trying to nip at us. This was unusual for him. We opened the little hut we had built for them (that they had never used) and found White Wing sitting on a nest of six eggs! Over the next three days, she laid 3 more. So, we are expecting nine baby geese in the next week or so. We thought maybe Pluto was male and White Wing was female but couldn't be sure...and we were NOT going to sex them! I'll be sure to post a photo when they arrive!

In other news, I ask for your prayers for my wonderful sister-in-law as they try to figure out what is going on with her health. She has been in some tremendous pain and is hospitalized yet they are still searching for the reason. Please send up some prayers that she will recover quickly from the surgery, that they may find an answer, and that it may be fixed and put her on the road to recovery very soon!

I also ask for prayers for a dear friend and her newborn daughter. Please keep them in your thoughts as they are currently hospitalized and going through some testing. I know this is a difficult time for Mom and she could really use some good thoughts.

Last but not least, please think positive thoughts for a dear friend who is undergoing a procedure this week. Just keep thinking positive...positive....positive! :)

On an exciting note, I logged on tonight to find that I have officially been assigned my state EMT license! It's official! I'm legal! :) I am pretty excited about that! I do have a couple leads on some part time postions that I will be checking into.

As far as the weight loss, it's still progressing. The jeans I have on are on the verge of falling off. This is, of course, great news! I'm not weighing in for another few days but will update when I do. I also have my measurements so that I can keep track of inches lost vs weight lost. Sometimes the scales don't move but the way your clothes fit tell you that something is changing! I'm okay with that too.

Tonight we tried ground turkey in our chili. It wasn't too bad. I didn't get to add all of the things I wanted to because it was late, we needed a quick dinner and I forgot to purchase everything I wanted to add. It was a bit bland but it definately is much healthier than ground beef. It has a ton of protein and much less fat. That's a good thing!

I guess I will let you all get back to what you were doing before this. I've just kind of rambled on here. Hopefully I will have something a bit more interesting than this in the next few days.

Stay safe,
Becky

Week Two

Two weeks later and 10.4 pounds gone! Things are going well.

The kids are doing good. Emilee celebrated her 6th birthday yesterday! Oh how the time has flown by! My baby girl is growing up into a wonderful young lady. As far as the kids, they are enjoying this warm weather that we are having (in spurts anyways). My oldest just told me that he was happy to see leaves on the trees. The girls are ready to put their swimsuits on and play in the hose. (not quite yet, ladies)

We've worked out in the yard a few days this past week cleaning out the flower gardens, rearranging flowers and getting our garden ready to go. Am I the only person who has tulips that are not in bloom yet? They are up, just not opened. I can't wait to see what colors they are.

Work is going well for me. I worked a day shift last week and it was much easier to pass the time. You were busy all the time, which is exactly how I like it. Working thirds has too much down time for me. I never thought I'd be saying that after chasing after five children daily.

Tim is now laid off. We are just taking it day by day and trying to stay as positive as possible.

Other exciting news...my brother is getting married in a few weeks! That's hard for me to believe! I'm super excited for him though!

I can't remember if I posted it or not but I did pass my National EMT exam. I am now waiting on the state to send me my license. I can now breathe a slight sigh of relief.

I am going to do my best to update throughout the week a little better. I ended up very busy and my time here was limited. Okay, nonexistant.

Hoping you are all healthy and doing well,
Becky

So far....

We're doing good! We are into day 3 (or 56 hours) without any soda. My last drink of soda was at somewhere in the 8'oclock hour on Friday night.

I'm not sure if the headaches I am having are from the caffiene withdrawl, the weather or the new medication I'm taking. I guess it could be all three. I have done well with drinking lots of water today. That's a good thing!

I was able to get some good, solid sleep. That helped me a ton. Once I fell asleep, I slept very hard. I ended up waking up sweating...alot! That is one thing this new medicine does that I don't care for. I sweat much more than I used to. Thank goodness for deodorant! :)

I'm starting to believe that this might really be MY time to find ME. I am surely hoping so. I feel like each day I am ripping a new layer away. Day by day, I am trying to uncover the person that I know is deep within. Soon, the rest of the world will be able to see her as well.

The appetite hasn't diminished completely but it is quite less than before. I am just not hungry. I have increased my fresh fruits and water intake by at least 200%. I have dropped all soda out of my "diet" (I hate that word). It has been only a couple days but I can feel the difference in my body. Of course, it's a positive thing. It sure is hard though.

As they say, "Quitters never win and Winners never quit!"

Journey to a new Me

Even though I had a very disturbing afternoon, I have still managed to be without soda for over 24 hours.

Twenty Four Very Long Hours

There are a couple things that are getting me "through" right now. Grapes, Strawberries, Watermelon and Pineapple. I have also been drinking water, OJ and Kiwi Strawberry Propel. Which reminds me...did you know:

Mountain Dew vs Propel (16.9 oz)
240 calories vs 20
90mg sodium vs 160
65 total carbs vs 5
65g sugars vs 4g

Also, one pound of body fat is equal to 3500 calories. In addition to that, I read on a website that a 20 oz bottle of Mt. Dew has approximately 10 teaspoons of sugar in it. The sugar in five 20oz pops equals 1,920 calories! Almost 2,000 calories!!!

For those of you that don't realize what a tough challenge that is for me, I can only stress how much of an addiction I have to soda and caffiene. it would not be uncommon for me on any given day to consume 2-4 20oz sodas. That's approximately 768 to 1536 calories per day from ONLY soda! Talk about empty, nonnutritional calories.

After the recent visit with my physician, we had a candid talk about the hold that "pop" had on me. It truly is an addiction, much like smoking or drinking. I found myself craving it so much. There were times that I didn't have any in the house and would leave in the middle of the evening just to go get a soda to satisfy the craving. It was that bad!

I'm not someone who particularly likes sweets. I don't like chocolate. My body can't tolerate ice cream. And so, my craving was for soda and the energy (although short lived) it provided me with.

It has taken me a good two weeks to convince myself that I can do this. I will kick this soda habit. And in the end, I will feel like a totally different person. A much healthier person. Someone who isn't drinking soda after soda just trying to make it through the next couple hours only to have my sugar levels crash at warp speeds, requiring even more to satisfy the cravings.

And so, I have begun the journey to a new me. Hopefully having an end result with less of me.

I'm hesitant to post exactly what my goals are. I realize now that it is because I am afraid of failure. Nobody wants to fail. Especially when you have people reading your inner most thoughts on a topic such as being addicted to something or as you battle the bulge. I thought if I could keep my failures to myself, I wouldn't be "failing" in public. Honestly, I have only been fooling myself. I now realize that.

And so, I will put my goals down on paper tonight and I will share them with my readers. My hope is that it will keep me motivated as I travel this up hill journey.

I have lost weight since I have started this only 3 days ago but for now, I think I am going to post weight changes once a week. That may change, we will see. :)

Have a great weekend everyone!

I'm fine...

No really, I'm not! And if it didn't hurt so darn bad, I'd scream to the world just how NOT fine I really am. For two weeks, I've been caring for sick children. I've made sure they have gotten to the doctors appointments, gotten their meds, and taken care of them as a mother does. So today, when I wake up, unable to swallow even my own saliva, it was no shock when the doctor came back and said, "You have strep throat." Afterall, what was the chance that I could escape without getting something, right?

And so, after a 4:00 pm appointment, I picked up my Rx at the pharmacy. I came home, dished up my own dinner, threw my blanket in the dryer so I was nice and toasty and then headed to bed. I was miserable. Scratch that (much like my throat feels). I AM MISERABLE!

And so, after finally getting to lay down at 7pm, imagine how frustrated I was to be woken up at 8:45. Then imagine the thoughts that rolled through my head when I walked out to find all of the clothes I had folded and sorted (and even some unfolded that were clean) scattered all over the dining room in baskets. And then imagine what words came flying out of my mouth when I saw that nothing (and I mean absolutely nothing) had been cleaned. Dishes literally everywhere.

Oh, really. I'm NOT okay. Between being extremely upset (and I use that term lightly), not being able to swallow my own saliva, feeling like my throat is on fire, and literally vomiting sauerkraut and sausage out through my nose, I cleaned the kitchen. I did the dishes. I tried to go take a bath but there was no hot water (thank you to whoever took the longest darn shower in the history of man kind and used every ounce of hot water!) and I currently have my blanket in the dryer warming up.

I'm miserable. And all the while, everyone else is sleeping peacefully without a care in the world. Including the one who woke me up to begin with to take one of my blankets because he was too lazy to get a different one.

Irritated? Absolutely, almost as much as my throat!

Strep is for the birds!

OUCH!

So, yes...I'm a clutz.

I've fallen, did manage to get back up but not without escaping from severly injuring my right ankle.

It wasn't all that long ago that I did a similar thing to my left ankle.

Sometimes, practice makes perfect. I just wish I hadn't managed to perfect the art of falling on my face! *sigh*

On a side note, the kids are hopefully on the mend. It was determined that Austin DOES have strep throat. He is now on antibiotics. The hospital called me Saturday to let me know and to call a Rx in. Jonathon is acting like he has it and by the looks of his throat, I would guess he does. Katelyn, I am not positive yet but she too is displaying the same symptoms that Austin started out with.

As long as it stays far away from me!


I'm off to take more pain meds. Hopefully it subsides a bit by tomorrow before I head out to class.

Have a great night!

On to a specialist...

I don't have a lot of time to fill in the blanks but I wanted to update you on my doctors appointment today.

First things first...my doctor is not very pleased with the local ER doctors. The diagnosis they gave me was inconsistent with the data that they had obtained. They were treating me for infectious colitis when infact, my WBC was completely normal. There was no indication of an infection what so ever. They also gave me a Rx for Vicodin and just sent me home.

After meeting with my doctor today, he confirmed my thoughts. I should not have been given the antibiotics (glad I didn't fill them). I should not be given a narcotic to take away the pain because we don't know what is causing the pain. He is pretty certain that there is something deeper going on and that it more than likely is related to the case of ischemic colitis that I had back in March.

While in the office, he promised that we would get to the bottom of this. He is referring me out to a vascular surgeon who is running some ultrasounds on the iliac and messentary arteries. That appt is Jan. 7th. I will meet with the surgeon the next day and discuss the results and plan of action. I'm also being set up to have a TEE to see if there is anything cardiac related that is causing these issues. In addition to the ten vials of blood they drew in the ER, he also had his staff draw a handful more today. He wants to check my liver enzymes and function tests, he wants to make sure the kidneys are working right and a few other things. From there, we may schedule another consult with a different GI doctor since the last one blew off the pathology reports from March.

If we still have no answers after all of this, then he is referring me to Cleveland to see the "big guns", he says.

In the mean time, he told me that we need to be overly aggressive. If I am feeling pain worsen, I need to head straight to the ER (a different one) and they will contact him for me. He said right now, we are running a risk of bowel perferation and/or loss of bowel and he doesn't want it to come to that.

I'm off to get the children. I'll update more when I can.

Not again...

After spending many hours in the ER, we received the results of the CT scan. Two right ovarian cysts and thickening of the intestines. The diagnosis was another bout of colitis.

Without having another colonscopy, I'm not sure that they will be able to determine the exact type of colitis. They are guessing infectious colitis. Back on March 3, I went to the ER for similar problems. The pathology results from that time was ischemic colitis!

I have an appointment with my physician on Thursday. I will then be scheduled with my GI doctor to figure out what to do now.

Dog-Gone it!

Another photo of one of the pups. This is Goldilocks! Isn't she adorable?




Here is Mr. Beuford. Check out his "grin" on his face!!


For more photos, see our flickr album.

Speaking of Dog-gone-it situations...

I am currently sitting in the ER awaiting a CT scan for possible appendicitis. Please keep me in your thoughts. With an IV in place, consumed contrast, morphine, nausea meds, lab work taken and a urine sample given, I now wait to see what the final thoughts are of the doctors. I'll update when I'm able. For now, I'm going to lay back down and curl up.

One of those days...

Ever had one before? You know, the days that you wake up but feel like you just want to crawl back into a hole? That's my day today.

I haven't felt quite "there" all week long. I even missed class yesterday because I couldn't get out of bed, that is until my friend came to check on me because I never showed up. I just have felt "off" lately.

I've had this pain in my chest and arm, which I am pretty sure is related to stress. It's not unbearable but it's evident. I'm calling the doctor tomorrow to make an appointment. I would be insistent if someone else had these symptoms that they go get checked out asap. However, being the stubborn patient, I chalk the symptoms up to other things and carry on about my day. I know, it's not the right thing to do.

Today, I have this migraine that is surfacing and just won't let go. I try to nip it at the first sign but forgot my migraine medication in my purse, which happens to be in the truck my husband has at the moment. I need to nip this now because I have class tonight and really don't want to miss it.

I'll check back later this evening, if I'm able. Have a great night!

I think we have a problem...

You know, most times I feel like I have it together. Lately, I feel like I couldn't have it together even if someone glued everything in place for me. My mind is absent. My memory is shot. Sleep eludes me. Nothing seems to be in order. Not. At. All.

Since the move, I've noticed myself not being the same. I keep relating it all to stress when in fact, I have no idea if that's the problem or not. I try not to be stressed out. I don't know how that's suppose to happen though considering everything that is going on.

• My hair is falling out.
• My back pain is a dull ache or searing pain and anything in between.
• My sleep pattern is nonexistent unless I take pain meds for my back. Then I sleep. Not a good combination during the daytime.
• My date book is full of things to remember but I can't seem to remember to look at it. This is causing issues.
• My laundry is never ending which tells me we still have way too many clothes. Time to eliminate half of them again.
• My children can't seem to adjust to a schedule this week at all even though we have discussed it often.
• My daughter is turning seven in a few weeks and has severe mood swings already. HUH? PMS at seven? Perhaps...
• My whole world is about to turn around and upside down next week as I begin classes at a new facility. Unfortunately, it's also an hour drive each way.
• Next week, hubby is changing his work schedule around to one that will benefit us all, eventually. However, it tends to be inconvenient until the kids are back to school.
• The kids start class in a few more weeks which given my mood lately, it's a few weeks too many.
• I'll begin the EMT program the same time they start class which has me away from them two to three times a week.
• The boys have football practice four nights a week, which messes up our routines including dinner and bedtimes.
• I find myself forgetting simple things such as tonight when I tried to cook pizza. I couldn't remember how to turn the oven off. And when I went to get the pizza out of the oven, I opened the fridge instead.
• I have a feeling my meds are causing this jittery feeling in my legs, especially. I'll be sitting still and suddenly will jolt for no reason.
• My mind races and keeps me up into the wee hours of the morning. Then I have a difficult time prying myself out of bed.
• My energy is wiped out. Completely!
• I'm finding myself sweating way more than I ever have.
• My chest becomes tight and begins to hurt, which I think is me just being over anxious and stressed about everything. (Even when I try not to be stressed or don't feel stressed)
• There's a place I should be at in a few weeks but financially and schedule-wise it just isn't an option.
• Hubby's vehicle is out of commission and we have no means of getting it taken care of right now. Hopefully soon. Very soon.
• If I had one wish right now that didn't involve being rich, healthy, or such, it would be to spend a few days alone with a good book. I'd love to do nothing but read and sleep for a few days. No interruptions. No responsibilities. Nobody else to cater to or worry about. Just me and only me.
• On second thought, I think spending the evening into the wee hours talking with some of my best friends until we all collapsed with exhaustion sounds appealing too. At least I know I won't have to cut their food up into little tiny pieces. :)
• Right now, I wish I had a maid and a nanny. Instead, I'll settle with crawling into my bed and snuggling with those that mean the world to me.
• Tomorrow, I'll put the Maid and Nanny hat on and get busy.

Sleep well everyone.

Hurting...

My back, that is. I have jacked up my back this weekend trying to get things moved. Not a good combo. It started almost two years ago when I finally found a doctor who would listen to my complaints and then run appropriate tests. Low and behold, those tests came back showing that my entire lower back is a mess. For the past six months or so, I've felt pretty good. When we moved the furniture in, I had to stop mid-carry because of a back spasm. Unfortunately, it's progressed. Please be patient. I'll try to post an update tomorrow. Tonight, it hurts to sit.

Off to bed...
-Becky

Gone but not forgotten

Nope, we're not gone. We're still here. Hopefully you haven't forgotten about us. I've thought of you all many times but have not had a spare moment to get here and post what we've been doing.

I have so many things I want to post but considering I'll be called away here in another five or ten minutes, I will have to post just the basics.

First things first, PLEASE pray for Jonathon. Once again, he is sick. I don't know why he continues to get sick and fight high fevers on a pretty consistent basis the past month +, but I'm getting pretty frusterated with it all. Once again, he is battling a fever. We are on day six, (Wednesday) and yesterday (Tuesday) his fever had hit 104.4. It was then that I made a call to his doctor asking for help. We took him in an hour later where they too were concerned about him. A raging fever, a heartrate of 145, very lathargic, on the brink of dehydration, and looking totally helpless was what they saw. The doctor told me she was very concerned about him and wanted us to take him to the hospital. Before going, she said she would do a strep test and an xray. He barely made a squeak during the strep test. For any child, it is a challenge to not want to kick, cry and scream. The xray had to be repeated because it was "dark". After repeating it, the doctor came in and said he had pnemunia. She gave us the option of trying an antibiotic at home with the combination of 6-8 oz of fluids an hour in addition to using the tylenol/motrin to reduce the fever. We've been trying that through the evening without much success. His heartrate has reduced slightly. His eyes remain glassy. He had a little energy for about 45 minutes before he fell back into the larthegic stage. I have been listening to his lungs at least once an hour and have just begun to notice a change in the sounds of them. Since I have a house of sleeping children and Tim's at work, I will stay up to continue monitoring his progress and status. We should be headed to the hospital around 5:00 AM. Please pray for him.

In other news: (Have to keep it brief, I hear him stirring)
*Circle drive & rock gardens still not finished.

*I ended up with two new kittens, Black Jack and Snicker Doodle (or Snickers). The kids couldn't understand why we couldn't use some of the names they came up with. You know, because there's no reason we can't yell out the back door, "Here coochie" or "Come on pissy". Don't ask! @@

*Gas prices, inflation on groceries and healthcare costs are killing our budget here. Is it true that we'll be seeing $12 a gallon by Labor Day? And bread, $2.99 a loaf? I'm quite concerned about our budget. Please send up a prayer for us if you can.

*Katelyn had her hair cut off. It's a cute, chin length cut.

*Emilee lost her first tooth Sunday. Unfortunately, it's from the result of her and a friend getting into electrical tape and then trying to "cut" it with her teeth! ACK! It was a baby tooth though. Whew

*Memorial Day weekend here was not a good one for several reasons. I hope everyone else had an enjoyable weekend.

*Postage stamps went up too? Good golly. (I know, not like yesterday but quite recently)

*Emilee is done for school for the year. She's thrilled. Frankly, so am I.

*Jacob is about to turn 11. Momma's not so thrilled.

*Jacob walked in during a documentary on polyigamy. He asked what it all meant and I spent the time to answer his questions as honestly and frankly as I could. He said he didn't want to live that way. Whew! Good thing there, Son. Thanks!

*Katelyn has been dealing with daily headaches for almost a week now. She's going in for an eye exam next week. Pray she doesn't suffer from migraines like I do.

*Austin is "color deficient" or color blind. We found this out at his eye appointment a week ago or so. It does cause some issues for his future.

*If you could, please pray for my health as well. The last two days, I've been dealing with a dizziness that I can't explain. It started Monday and was worse today. It was to the point this evening that I was afraid of driving. Pray it goes away quickly.

Ack! I hear Jonathon stirring. I'll hopefully post photos in a day or so....

Cruddy

Oh my goodness! Let me tell you, we have the most beautiful weather right now. There is only one small problem. Momma is sick.

Early Monday morning, Jonathon was throwing up. Tuesday morning, Emilee was throwing up. Wednesday morning, Jonathon was throwing up again. Wednesday night, Momma's back decided to stop functioning. After some good drugs, she carefully crawled into bed shortly after 9pm.

By this morning, my skin has become ultra sensitive, which makes it real interesting when you must wear clothes. It almost feels as if I have a horrible sunburn on my back, especially my lower back. As the day has progressed, so has the sensitivity. My lower back feels like I'm having 1000 needles jabbing in it, my left leg aches and throbs and even though I feel like I'm burning up, I want to do nothing but wrap the most plush blanket in the house around my body to protect it from hurting.

Please make this go away!! I know my back is hurting from a flare up from back injuries I have. Unfortunately, after tonight, I'll be out of any type of medicine that will bring me any relief. I'll be calling the doctor in the morning to see what they can do.

And to top it all off, I'm losing my voice. Oh, life is fun!

Stay Healthy!

Mid Week Check In

I only have a few minutes to update here. The kids are getting ready to do chores and get their things around for the surprise we have for them. (More on that later)

Prayers are still needed for my grandfather. He is still in the hospital with pnemonia. They've changed the antibiotics they were using to another in hopes of them being more effective.

I followed up with my primary doctor on Tuesday. At this time, we are trying to find out what caused the ischemic colitis episode. He is also thinking that there is a link between my December ER visit for chest pain and my March ER visit for abdominal pain. He is awaiting the records from the December visit. He will then go over them carefully. He's also scheduled me for several different blood tests to check various things. One thing he questions is whether or not I have a clotting issue. He asked if they checked me for a pulmonary embolism during my chest pain visit. (No, they didn't). I told him they just labeled it gastroenteroitis and called it good. During that visit, they had to use dilauded and ativan to get me comfortable because the morphine wasn't touching the pain. This last visit, they used ativan and Morphine and sent me home on vicodin. So, he will go over the records, the blood tests, and told me to start taking an aspirin a day. If we don't find something with these, we will consider being sent to a hematologist.

Need to run, Emilee is squealing.

Diagnosis: Colitis

More specifically, ischemic colitis. No real "plan" of action other than to watch and wait. I have another appointment with my PCP tomorrow morning to discuss his opinion on the results as well.

Just wanted to give you a heads up and thank you for your prayers! I am exhausted and heading to bed.

Thanks again,
Becky

Patience!

It's not something I have much of as of late but it's something I am asking for from my readers. :) Kindly, I might add.

Again, THANK YOU to every person who has emailed, called, stopped by, gone driving with me, and prayed for me. I appreciate every single one of you more than you know.

I'm obviously in a "funk" right now and my lack of posts show it. The last week or so has been a whirlwind emotionally and physically. Even when I have felt my worst, everything and everyone around me still moves forward. Life goes on. The kids still need tending to. The studies still need done. The house still needs cleaned (okay, so I'm slacking some). The laundry still needs washed. Dinner still needs cooked. I'm sure you all get my point.

On Saturday night, I received several phone calls after incorrect information spread like wildfire. I was also informed that I was having surgery to remove my colon and to place a colostomy bag on Monday. This is False information. I am not sure how what I had said to someone was taken out of context and turned around but it was. (It's okay, Grandma. Sorry if I led you to believe that. Love you!)


I've wanted to update the last few nights but my lovingly two year old monster son has developed an issue with his internal clock. Apparently, Daddy's way of putting him to bed this weekend has reset that clock so that bedtime occurs anytime after midnight (rather than my 7 or 8 o'clock bedtimes). So, I'm finding myself frusterated after hours upon hours of getting the lil guy down to sleep! He's even learned how to fake me out. He fake snores! Lil stinker!

So, since he's awake, at my feet, shredding the box of baby wipes into tiny little pieces and putting them back in the container, I will share a brief update from the past few days.

*Next appt. is Monday
*Signed consent form to get my op report from '98 and last week.
*Hoping to get a call tomorrow to come pick the report up and see results before appt.
*Spent a ton of time on every website I could find to find out as much information about UC and Crohn's Disease.
*Compared every bowel picture on said sites to my photos looking for similar and/or different ones (and their diagnosis')
*Called Monday to make the appointment for the results. She tried to tell me that they don't do follow ups unless it's abnormal. The patients are told to call in a week to get their results over the phone. Come to find out:
*I need to be seen in the office to follow up.
*The meds I was put on are for either UC or Crohn's (or both).
*The Asacol is probably what is giving me a headache (but not to stop it).
*They are serious when they tell you not to miss a day especially if you're not in remission. (yep, I made that mistake. Wanted to see if they were causing the headaches.
*Missing a day will result in pain and bleeding the next day. (Yep, felt like such a genius, I tell you.)
*And No, my results were not in the office when I called but they were waiting for them.

So, to sum all this babble up...
I will be getting a pathology report this week sometime, allowing me to see the diagnosis before my follow up appointment on Monday (1:30PM EST). I will at least be able to go in "armed" with information that I gather from my countless hours on the 'net this weekend as well as the wonderful friends who have stepped up to share their UC and Crohn's Disease battles. (Thanks...you know who you are!) I've been given the name of a great GI doctor who has helped a friend with her battle. I thank you for the information as I plan to use it!!

My little monster boy is still wired and awake. I'm going to sign off here and see if I can't get him into bed. I'm tired myself and could use the sleep. I wanted to share a few "uplifting" stories too but tonight won't be the night. I'll try to do that tomorrow as I sit here celebrating another year gone by. So to remind me, here is a little "insight" for you all.

Is Bigger Always Better? Typical Man Always thinking it's larger than it really is.

Mom, I want to go.... A few places the kids would rather spend vacation at this summer. Like, HOME!

Reminder... Austin's little note he left for me on my computer desk. Cute!

That's all for now. I'm sure I'll remember more after I lay my head down in my bed. Hope to catch up with you all more tomorrow.

Thankful for each of you,
Becky

Checking in....

while checking out.

Disconnected. That's what I feel.

I will try to share with you what is heavy on my heart later this evening after the children are tucked into their beds.

Until then, know that I am home and doing okay.

-Bec

Difficult day

First and foremost, THANK YOU to those who have emailed, called, and stopped by to check on me. It really means alot.

This post is of a rather "personal" nature but I'm going to post it anyways. Please, if your one to be offended by such posts, you may want to skip this entry. It's just much easier for me to "say" it once than to repeat it to several people who want to know what's wrong.

On Monday, at approximately 2:30 AM, I was woken up with the worst abdominal pains ever. Knowing that I have a high pain tolerance, the strength of this pain alarmed me. I felt as though I needed to have a bowel movement and rushed upstairs. Once there, I couldn't go. The next several minutes were quite scary. I went from shaking uncontrollably to feeling my hands, feet and eventually my face start tingling and go numb. I couldn't stand as I became very weak so I stretched far enough to open the window. The bitter cold air from outside was the only thing I could think of to keep me from passing out. It was that bad. I became dizzy, very lightheaded, continued to shake, started to sweat and felt naseaus. I made a conscious effort to slow my breathing down for fear of passing out cold. Sometime within the next hour, I did have a bowel movement. Feeling somewhat better, I got up to head back to bed. Then I felt like I had to go again. This time, there was no scary symptoms as listed already. I finished, thinking I had a case of dirarrhea, only to stand and see the toilet filled with blood. Trying not to panic, I convinced myself that perhaps it was a fluke and that I was just fine. I went back to bed.

For the next five hours, I was in a great deal of pain with the constant need to rush to the toilet. There was no stool anymore. I was only passing blood. Large amounts of blood. I finally called the doctor who urged me to head to the hospital. Being stubborn, I thought I could hold out a bit longer. I showered, had several more "episodes", and finally woke Tim up to take me in.

Once there, they ran several tests (bloodwork, urine, x-ray, ct scans, rectal exam and even a stool sample). To give you an idea, the little urine cups you give samples in, was filled with blood for the "stool" sample. Only problem, there was no "stool". After convincing them that I hadn't gone on some exotic vacation and gotten a parasite, and having all tests come back fine, I was sent home on Vicodin. (The morphine and ativan worked wonders in the hospital though).

On Tuesday, I followed up with my family doctor who then referred me to a GI doctor for a colonoscopy ASAP.

Today I had the colonoscopy done with several biopsies taken. I had a considerable amount of pain even with the "conscious sedation" they gave me. I begged several times to "stop" as my insides felt as they were being ripped out. After the procedure, the doctor came in to discuss the preliminary findings with us. I will return next week to discuss the pathology report with him on the biopsies he took. However, the initial findings indicate ulcerative colitis. From the photographs he gave us, it is affecting the left side of the colon from the splenic flexure down the descending colon. It is possible that Crohn's Disease could be an issue as well.

I had a colonoscopy done ten years ago and the results came back "normal" with possible "IBS" (irritable bowel syndrome). Comparing those photos with these new ones are like night and day. The new ones show definate ulcerations, pus pockets (which I assume are infection), and are just plain icky looking. (Not like the inside of your colon is pretty anyways!)

I have been started on three medications. Asacol 400MG (2tabs 3x day), Cipro (2tab 2x day), and Flagyl (1tab 2x day). I looked up Asacol and it is used for ulcerative colitis. The Cipro is for the infection and the Flagyl I believe is used to prevent a yeast infection (which is a common side effect of Cipro for some women). Thankfully I've never suffered from one so I wouldn't know.

So, with all of that said, my mind is whirling at 100mph. I have looked up a great deal of information on ulcerative colitis. I will post those findings later but for now, I need to go take care of a little one who is definately keeping me on my toes tonight.

Please continue to keep me in your thoughts. Thanks

In your thoughts...

I ask that you keep me in your thoughts this week as I struggle through some health issues that landed me in the hospital yesterday. We are continuing to run tests to see what is causing the incredible pain and continous bleeding. The next test will be ran on Thursday at 10am. Think of me if you have a moment, please.

Thanks