July, already?

It's hard to believe that it's already the first week of July. It seems that the time has flown by these last few months.

Things are going okay. Busy, as usual.

The things on our plate seem to change often. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. The kids don't seem to be bothered by it, so I suppose that is a plus. Now if I could just quit finding grey hair, I'd be happy.

I haven't mastered the art of "letting things go" very easily. My stress level is surely way too high. I'm not sure that I know how to operate on anything less though.

I'm still in school. I feel like I'm making a career out of being a student. *sigh* I am debating on what path to follow for the fall but will soon have my mind made up and registered for classes.

I'm still in a summer class and have about three weeks left before I'm done with that. Next week I have to go in to give a speech. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate public speaking. Send me good thoughts. You know, the ones that help me to not be nervous!

I'm still working, a lot! I've put in to have my hours scaled back beginning mid August because I won't be able to keep up with everything if I don't.

As some may know, we have been looking for a different place to live. There isn't anything wrong with the location or house that we are in now. We just would like to find something that is ours instead of paying so much in rent every month to gain nothing. We've been hesitant to say anything, hoping not to get our hopes up or jinx ourselves; however, I think we may have found a place. We are suppose to go look at it Tuesday afternoon/evening. I will let everyone know what we find out, when we find anything out. It would involve us moving from our current town into another one about 15 miles away. It would put me closer to the ambulance and Tim farther from the Fire Department. Can we say conflict of interest. :)

Tim is still laid off from GM. He is suppose to return on Aug 10th. We shall see. That has been a nightmare that we can't seem to sort out or wake up from lately. I would like to go back to having a routine...and soon!

I ask that you send up some good thoughts for not only all of the changes that we are facing but also for our Niece. She is currently expecting her second child and we ask that you send up good thoughts that everything will turn out perfectly. She and her husband welcomed their first child, a precious Daughter, earlier this year. Sadly, she passed away. Please keep their family in your thoughts as they go through these next few months with great anticipation and some fear as well.

There really isn't much more to update everyone on. Emilee is learning to ride a "two wheeler" and can't decide if she likes it or not. The kids are playing outside from sun up until after dark. They love the outdoors.

The baby chicks have grown into grown chickens, well, and dinner. Quick story on that, Tim didn't think that anything would bother them. Needless to say, we are now six chickens short and a wild animal had a tasty dinner. Darn food chain!

Our gardens are doing great. We already have some of the crops coming on. Yum! I can't wait to have the fixings for a fresh salad!

We are gearing up for our yearly family camping trip. The kids are thrilled and I am, well, not. I'm ready for the break and ready to enjoy the time "away" but I am not looking forward to packing up everything to go. I'll survive though. I always do.

I hope that each of you enjoyed your holiday weekend. I spent mine working. Such is life, I suppose.

Keep in touch,
-Becky

Could you....Would you....?

Stop on over to Jessica's blog and leave her some encouragement during this difficult time? She's such a wonderful friend who is facing some of the hardest days ahead of her. She remains hospitalized, possibly until she delivers her daughter. She's in her 27th week now. Her two little boys and husband are 90 minutes away from her.

Jess and I have been close for a very long time. As Tim and I grew our family over the years, she witnessed the complications that filled my pregnancies and births. She was there for me through the times that I was on bed rest, hospitalized and away from my children. She offered her love, support and help whenever I needed it. Having been in her situation four times myself, I can relate to what she is having to endure. If you've ever been placed in the hospital, away from your family and friends, you can understand how overwhelming your emotions can become too.

The emotions you go through can rock you to the core. They can be brutal. They can be selfish. They can make you and others question your sanity. Depression can set in and you may begin to feel angry at everyone around you. You find yourself wanting visitors, but when they leave, anger and sadness washes over you because they left you, alone. The evenings are difficult as you lay there, alone. You begin to feel helpless and worry that your children will feel abandoned. You find yourself longing to be the one to feed, bathe and put your child to bed. You even start to miss the things you disliked doing such as dishes, laundry, and housework. The pain you feel deep in your heart when you know you must choose one child over the others is tough to handle. Having to stay in the hospital away from your other children who are at home, at grandma or grandpas or a friends isn't how things are suppose to go. We feel as if we have no control over anything anymore. We feel a sense of loss when we're not able to be up and moving like everyone else who has a "normal" pregnancy. You feel humiliated when you're refused the opportunity to bathe or use the bathroom unassisted. There's nothing enjoyable about being placed in the Trendelenburg position (head down, feet up). It can be embarrassing being told you must use a bedpan instead of the toilet, or having to receive a sponge bath instead of a shower. We begin to feel like a pin cushion and at times, violated as we endure all that we must to maintain the pregnancy and monitor the progress. It's normal to have feelings of guilt that wash over you as you lay in bed blaming your body for failing you. You feel as if your being held captive as you remain in your bed day after day, just waiting. Asking questions but receiving no definite answers becomes frustrating. Wanting to know when you can go home to your family but being told you're required to stay "a while" is difficult. You find yourself praying for the safety of your child, knowing that each day they remain inside is two less in a NICU, and moments later you find yourself just wishing you were done.

I found myself making bargains with God. "If I can be released and go home, I promise I won't do anything but stay in bed." He knew I couldn't do what I promised. Even though I was hurting mentally and physically, He had the plan in place to keep me and my child safe. Safely tucked away in an OB Special Care Unit where I could be taken care of around the clock.

So many people are quick to judge when they hear the word, bed rest. They think bed rest is the mother getting a break, a vacation, or being lazy. Many of them have never been on bed rest. What they don't understand is that if you're placed on bed rest, chances are you wish you were not. Nobody I have met, mentored, or supported through Sidelines has ever felt as if they were getting a break or on a vacation, myself included. It's exhausting mentally and physically. The things we do when faced with complications that could result in a premature birth are certainly not entertaining.

So please, stop on over to Jessica's page and send her some kind words.

With love,
Becky

Chatter Box

So I realize I've done alot of "chattering" lately after a long string of no posts. :) I guess I was being lazy having writers block.

This weekend was a interesting weekend, to say the least.

Friday, our normal plans were a bust due to weather. Instead we decided we'd celebrate with our friends on their 10th anniversary! Double Digits. Woooo hoo! Congratulations to them...and may you experience many more.

Unfortunately, the weather moved in quickly and took out our power. We (women) came home and rescued the sitter before the kids could freak out. Then Tim ended up on fire calls for the next few hours. Finally about 9:30pm, we had moved the kids to the other couple's house and decided to head to Red Lobster to celebrate. All I can say is the husbands boys were not on their best behavior. The poor waitress (who was a good 20 years older than us) rolled with their hormonal, teenage boy talk chattering and even gave us a few good laughs too! It's a good thing they put us back in the far corner, alone. After a nice very large Strawberry Lobsterita, we headed home. We were still without power with a restoration of 4pm on Saturday.

Saturday, the power came back unexpectedly around 5:30am. We woke up and started getting ready for Jacob's birthday party. The kids had a great time. It was a day filled with ten children, four adults, many laughs, a cake fight, a hose fight (between two moms), burgers, hotdogs, chips, and lots of fluids. And of course, a few pretty bad sunburns even after applying lots of SPF 50 sunscreen. (Needless to say, I ended up buying SPF 70 for now on) The evening ended up bringing more storms but we kept our power. Unfortunately, one of Jacob's guests had to leave early since he wasn't feeling well. He arrived home only to vomit all over! Poor Guy. In the middle of the night, Emilee started throwing up too. I'm pretty sure it was from too much sun mixed with a bit of dehydration.

Sunday was filled with more playing and a few slow-moving adults who were tired from the weekend fun. Errands were run, kids filled the yard, and storms rolled in again in the afternoon causing us to lose power once again. *sigh* We had it back on in the early evening though, thank goodness!

Monday, Jacob was miserable. He had the worst burn I've ever seen on one of my kids. He wasn't blistered or peeling so we kept applying topical sprays and aloe. Nothing seemed to work, he said.

Tuesday, was a good friends 32 birthday! Happy Birthday, Damon! Hope it was a good one. It was also the day another Great-Nephew was born!

Jacob also called home from school again. This time, he said he wanted to come home. He said his skin was falling off. I told him I'd go down and look at it and then decide. Needless to say, he came home. He said some kids were poking at his burn and pushed skin right off. The school put two bandaids on it, which then ended up peeling a huge section of skin off his shoulder, leaving it very raw and sore. I tried several things to help him. Nothing was working. I read up on various treatments via the internet and found that a zinc oxide works well (found in desitin). I remembered when Jonathon was in the RNICU and had a horrible diaper rash that nothing would cure. They called down for this skin paste and I still had it. It had 20% zinc rather than the 11.4% of butt ointment. So, I used that on his shoulders last night along with a cool shower, cool compresses and motrin. This morning, he said it felt better but was still open, oozing and very sore. He had a field trip today so we put no-stick pads on the area and wrapped him up so his shirt wouldn't rub on it today. I hope he does well through the day! So far, no phone calls.

And here we are, Wednesday. The kids have a 1/2 day of school tomorrow and Friday and they are done for the summer.

I'll check in again later, I'm sure. I hope you are all enjoying your week.

It's another BOY!

Unintentionally, I left out of my previous announcements the fact that someone I adore, consider a dear friend, look up to, and have been blessed to have as a teacher to two of my children so far is also expecting...

A Baby Boy!

Congratulations Chad & Amy. I'm thrilled for the two of you and can't wait until October! :)

And as a side note to a previous announcement, Tim's niece Alice found out she is having a baby Boy too! I believe the due date is in October as well.

All of these little baby boys! My heart is melting here!

It's a Boy!

Congratulations Lorene & Jeremy on the birth of your son and to Ethan on becoming a big brother!

Born June 10, 2008 at 6:00 PM weighing 9lb even and 22 in long.

Congratulations Lorene on achieving the VBAC you had your heart set on! I'm so proud of you.

Congratulations!!

To Jess on the upcoming birth of her Daughter!

To Wendi on the birth of her darling daughter, Sheila.

To Lorene on the impending birth of her Son.

To Alice and Carrie on their pregnancies and upcoming births.

Can you believe it? We're Great Aunt Becky and Great Uncle Tim x 2 already. After tonight, it will be 3. And by next spring, we will have five great nieces/nephews.

Wow! Where does the time go?

I remember when Tim and I started dating nearly 17 years ago. Wendi, Lorene, Alice and Carrie were all little cuties. I remember Alice asking me one evening, so innocently, "Are you going to marry my Uncle Tim and have babies?" And now, here she is, expecting her own little one in a few months. Jess was babysitting MY first baby and now, she's having her third!

Congratulations to each of you. We love you!